Patti Lind - facilitation - resolution - change Communication at Work - A Monthly eNewsletter

July 2009

Creative Teambuilding

Discover what you have in common.

Divide members of your team up in pairs, ideally people who interact less frequently with one another. Ask them to find out how many things they share in common.

Encourage them to go beyond superficial commonalities (e.g. we are both men) and discover the more significant ways they have commonalities. Report their most favorite commonality to the larger group after 3 -5 minutes.

Recommended Book

Tribal Leadership: Leveraging Natural Groups to Build a Thriving Organization
by Dave Logan, John King and Halee Fischer-Wright

The premise of this book is that people form natural tribes around their view of the world and their life.

It covers how a leader can influence people to move from thinking "my life sucks" to "I'm great" to a "we're great" mentality. I just loved this book and have been incorporating it in my work with groups and individuals.

Communication Tip of the Month

Patti LindListen - even if you think you have the answer.

Listening is a tremendously undervalued skill in the business world. Particularly at the higher levels, where people feel constrained for time and the heavy weight of responsibility, it is often tempting to make quick decisions without always consulting others on the team. But, moving too quickly towards resolution, without having all the critical information and helping people become emotionally onboard, rarely leads to the best results.

I think part of the problem is that smart people think quickly and once they get the “gist” of a point, they stop being curious. You'll see them nodding their heads quickly, interrupting the speaker and hijacking the conversation to their view of things. When you get a roomful of leaders, the problem becomes more pronounced and a facilitator might be needed to ensure listening doesn't get lost in all the talking.

Consider This

In my listening courses, I suggest people view listening as filling out the picture of a tree. Someone's initial statement is merely the trunk of the tree. It seems substantial enough but the story needs mapping out just as a tree expands out into branches. You can explore the various branches of someone's viewpoint by asking questions such as:

  • Tell me how this idea would be implemented?
  • You seem to have strong feelings about this, tell me about that?
  • Do you have concerns regarding your viewpoint?
  • Is there some background to your viewpoint, that would be important for me to know?

I have one client who goes into meetings with complicated discussions with a drawing of a tree on her notepad. This is her way of reminding herself to listen fully and deeply before she rushes in with her own views and answers.

Even if you just commit yourself to asking 4 or 5 open, curious questions, you will surpass the listening skills of 90% of the people you work with. And the results will be better for everyone.

Do you have a question for Patti? Send an email to patti@pattilind.com and it may be answered in next month's newsletter.
Contact Patti Lind: www.pattilind.com | patti@pattilind.com | 503.775.1662